¿Dónde está el Baño(s)?

Saturday Guadalupe took Danielle and me to Baños. Guadalupe had told me about 17 times that we had to leave at 5 AM so we could get there with plenty of time to do things since we weren’t staying the night and it’s about a 3 ½ hour drive. So I woke up at 4:30 to be ready by 5. Well 5 passed by and Guadalupe still wasn’t up. I went downstairs to get some breakfast and when I came back up at 6 she still wasn’t up! I guess she didn’t set an alarm because Pato woke her up around 6:20 and we finally left at 7. So much for leaving early.

We went to pick Danielle up and we were off. I basically fell asleep immediately but I woke up when we were in some town and Guadalupe was looking for somewhere to get ‘café’ which, for her, means both coffee and breakfast. We drove around looking for some specific place which ended up not being open and then we looked for a different, but suitable, restaurant but apparently there wasn’t one. In this town we bought some biscochos from a lady on the street so Guadalupe could ask directions. Also there was a sign above the bridge in the town that said “cuidad de vivir” ‘a town to live in’ but I thought it said ‘cuidado de vivir’ which wouldn’t be grammatically correct but would basically mean ‘be careful to live/survive.’ I thought it meant the bridge was really treacherous!

From there it seemed like Guadalupe wasn’t sure where we were going. We were heading towards Ambato- following the signs no less- but she stopped to ask four or five people which way to go. They all just told her to follow the signs. Finally we got to Ambato. We drove around there as well to find somewhere to eat and we finally stopped in a little store/restaurant and got a fixed breakfast. We got bread, coffee, juice and an egg- pretty typical. From there we went into downtown Ambato which is a fairly large city. Once we were in town she continued yelling out the window to people, asking them which way to go. Of course they all told her to follow the road she was on. By this time I had already lost count of how many people she asked, but Ambato was just the start.

Guadalupe told us that she had family from Ambato and that they are very good looking there. I didn’t see it but I wasn’t particularly paying attention. Even though she asked every single person we passed on the street we still got turned around. Finally we were out of Ambato and on our way to Baños!

Once out of Ambato there were signs pointing us towards Baños but Guadalupe continued asking people where to go. It was really starting to drive me crazy! On the way we drove through a portion of road that was being worked on but instead of working on it lane by lane the entire stretch of road (both ways) was completely gone! It was just dirt. Good thing it wasn’t raining or there wouldn’t have been a road at all since it was at the foot of a mountain. We also drove through a town that seemed to sell exclusively jeans! Every single storefront had mannequin legs modeling the jeans. Where were all of the torsos??

At one point we had to take a detour because the road was out and the detour was not marked so we pulled over and asked a lady on the street. That was justified. The next 10 people we asked were not. They ALL told us to just keep going on the same road we were on. As infuriating as it was, the drive was really pretty. It was all in the mountains with little towns in the valleys. It was cute. At one point we crossed a ravine on a sturdy looking bridge but Guadalupe was freaking out. I don't know if it was a joke or not.

Finally we made it to Baños, after asking just a few more people, and there was nowhere to park. Also it was 11 by then. Finally we found somewhere to park and Guadalupe took us to “Nicole’s” laundry service/excursion agency to see what we could do there. Apparently Baños is the most EXTREM (yes that’s how they spelled it) place in Ecuador. Just about everything that this laundry service was “full adrenaline” like rafting, canyoning (repelling down waterfalls) and puenting (which is jumping off bridges and swinging from them for a while). They also had horseback riding and a truck that takes you around to see the waterfalls. Since Danielle is allergic to horses it was the truck!

Honestly neither of us wanted to do anything particularly ‘extrem’ plus Guadalupe wasn’t going to go, she was just going to wait around until we got back. So we decided to take advantage of the baños part of Baños- the hot springs. So we went up to the municipal pool which is fed by a hot spring attributed to some Virgen. Guadalupe really didn’t want to go- she said we should go to a spa for a private pool because “everyone comes here”- but I at least wanted to experience the hot springs. Plus it only cost $2. The spa was fairly cheap but they just had a chlorine pool- why would we go all the way there for that? So we went to the municipal with “the whole world” and it wasn’t great. The water was brown- I know it wasn’t dirty but it smelled funny from all the minerals- and there were a lot of kids splashing around. And there were a lot of poor excuses for swim suits which made things uncomfortable. It was basically a public hot tub, but the experience was something.

Just outside the pool was a waterfall where people were washing themselves and we saw one woman drink from it. I think it’s supposed to be blessed. While Danielle and I sat in the pool Guadalupe went to find us some towels because I could tell there was no way she was getting in that water- blessed or not. Before she left she told us to make sure we watched our stuff because she was sure someone would steal it. Just about when she got back with our Galápagos Islands towels it started to rain. So we got out and changed and went back to the laundry service to take our truck ride.

When we got back to Nicole’s they told us the truck left already and we would have to wait until 3 (it was about 1:30) for the next one. We decided that would be too late since we still had to drive home so we went to get lunch. We drove around for literally 20 minutes on the same 5 roads trying to find a suitable restaurant to eat lunch at. We stopped during our search to go into a crap store- Guadalupe seems to love them- to look at souvenirs. Danielle was picking out some postcards and she had one of a little indigenous-looking girl and Guadalupe took it out of her hands, put it back and gave her one with llamas on it instead. She said “do you think we look like that? We don’t look like that. Here, take this one, these you see here.”

In the doorway of just about every store there is someone pulling taffy from a hook in the doorjamb. Guadalupe bought some and we ate it while looking for lunch. It was really hard and you had to put part in your mouth then hit it to break off a piece. After driving around some more we ended up at a little cafeteria and got giant lunches per usual. I had fried steak and it was bigger than my head! We also drank sugarcane juice with lime because it “cleans your blood” and it will cure my allergies.

During lunch Guadalupe- who only had soup- ate a ton of my fries! She even got some mayo for her to dip them in and she didn’t say a word. It’s not like I didn’t have enough to eat but still! Then we left. On the way back we made our way to Ambato only asking for directions 5 times! The ride home was really long but I think it was partially due to the fact that we listened to Guadalupe’s favorite singer the entire time. Apparently she really likes Spanish music and she asked us if we knew any. I said I only knew Rodrigo y Gabriela and she said they were good but I’m not sure if she knew who they were or not. When Danielle mentioned Buena Vista Social Club- who are Cuban the horror- Guadalupe, who had never heard their music, told us they must be terrible just because they’re from Cuba. I asked her what that had to do with music and she said that since Cuba is such a terrible country, all of the music is protest music and awful. I really don’t know where she gets this crap.

The music that we were subjected to was terrible, however. Danielle read that this guy Rafael has been equated to the Liberachi of Spain but I don't know if that's good or bad. Either way it was awful. And to make matters worse, she didn’t have a legit CD but an MP3 CD so we literally listened to it for 3 hours straight. At one point I wanted to throw myself out of the car and down the mountain. Here’s why. On the way back we went back through that first town and found the restaurant Guadalupe wanted to go to in the morning. It was basically a meat restaurant. She wanted to eat there but we had just eaten 2 hours ago, and a lot. So we got a doggy bag for both the house and Danielle’s family. She made us try the pork and a mini empanada which were really good but I had no appetite at all. The counter was full of meat so we wanted a picture but the lady told us to come behind to take it. It was pretty hilarious.

From there we didn’t go the same way home but we did go through a bunch of towns that looked the same. In one their apparent claim to fame is this special layered ice cream which looks like it was made in a cup and while it was still soft, a stick was put in the bottom- like when you make popsicles as a kid. We stopped to get some and it was pretty good but the owners of the store were waiting for us to leave so they could close.

Once it started getting dark Guadalupe seemed to get really lost. She pulled over and asked a ton of people where to go but a bunch of them didn’t know. Finally we got back to Tumbaco and we stopped- again!- to get dog food. By this time this was the most ridiculous trip I’d been on and I just wanted to be home!

Since we were super tired and nothing else was going on we decided to watch movies at Danielle’s house. I volunteered my house but Guadalupe was too tired. I understand though because the tv is right outside her room which inexplicably lacks a door. At Danielle’s we ended up watching Arrested Development on my computer since the tv is in her parent’s room and her computer was locked up. It was pretty great. Emily and Chris fell asleep immediately but Lauren, Danielle and I enjoyed it.

Hasta Luego,

Caitlin